The Power of Reflex Association

It was roughly seven months ago when I got a call from a former sub of mine. It had been almost 7 years before when we had started our adventure together. At that time she was in my servitude for about 5 1/2 months. We took about 9 months apart and she returned for another 2 months of more intense training from me. A need given some complexities of her life. Another 18 months passed and, post separating from her finance at the time – she came and lived with me for 3 weeks. She needed Master to remove all the complexities of the world during that time so that she could regain herself and start living again. And now, 7 months ago – I get a call from her.  She was in town with her now wife of a year – and wanted to catch up (as well as introduce me). It was a raucous dinner and drinks that ended post the restaurant closing in the AM -and we all got along wonderfully – and even shared a few stories (much to her displeasure of such). At the minimum – her wife expressed being more comfortable with me than she had ever thought possible. A few days later another call – they were heading back out in another day and her wife had suggested that she and I grab lunch to say goodbyes.

There wasn’t much time – just an hour to meet up – and we wound up meeting at a deli close to their hotel. The moment while in the deli when the “Orders Up” bell rang is the opening to this post – a deli bell – but once rang this former sub of mine – without thinking – dropped to her knees in front of me. Embarrassment, and a bold laugh out loud from us both – a remnant of my former training and her servitude – a time when this Master used such a bell in training. The power of Reflex Association. (Note since I have moved to other less common triggers of pavlovian design – I favor a copper bell in the last 5 years, among other things).

I had such a bell all those years ago – and used it in training. It signaled immediate oral servitude – and I had trained her well. Now – almost seven damn years later – and while in my presence – the training was still there. (I felt pride by the way – intense pride – when this occurred). A month after they left town from their visit they received a belated wedding present from me. A deli bell – gifted to her wife. A few emails later and I received assurances that the gift was very VERY well received.

I will be sharing today 5 instruments and techniques for such training of a sub.

  1. Auditory response.  Training of a sub based upon a particular sound. A bell, a chime, a pattern, or – a “Phrase”. The magic count in training is between 70-110. Yes – I am giving you the secret formula now. If you can train your sub to respond reactively to an auditory response – immediately and without hesitation – 70-110 times – it is now part of their nature.  When beginning this training  – overemphasize the importance of response. Over punish when missed. You need it to successfully occur 70-110 times before it is “Instant Response” without thought.

 A few examples (and as every sub is different – different responses are set).

        One sub got so used to my hard snapping of my fingers as the trigger to undress and kneel, that the raising of my hand and my fingers appearing to be in “snapping position” would cause her to freeze. I would delay the SNAP to her wide eyes, to keep her held in suspense, as she knew she would not start the prescribed action until the audible snap had occurred and – when it did, she had 3 seconds to meet this Masters demands. She over time learned to wear clothes that could be removed within the 3 second window – especially after having torn two blouses and one skirt before in failing to meet the criteria. Punishment for failure again – was intense versus normal. Such is Auditory and pavlovian training.

Another sub (oh such a wonderful experience) was a choreographed dancer – she resonated with precision in a long trail of movements. Her Auditory was the phrase “And so it goes” – which required a perfect execution of sensual slithering and movements to satisfy her dom. I knew her parents and family well and a year after our ending I sent them a letter at Christmas time to add to their tradition of friends and family and of appreciation of the people in their lives. I learned the sister read my letter aloud to the family (as part of their tradition) and – as I included the phrase “And so it goes” 3 times – resulted in my former sub reaching out to me with the starting phrase of “You wonderful Wicked Bastard”. (I take pride in that as well).

2) Trained Association. There are many subs that are subs because of intense need in their lives. I personally have had (and helped) numerous subs with PTSD of varying depths. (I gravitate towards this in fact – I have a need to be a healer for such I suppose). There is often a need for a Dom to be the one to remove the complexities of a rough world – to remove such and bring reality to a different focus – the focus of just the time with the dom. I know full well what this is, the need for such, and the intense responsibility to have such a power gifted unto me. For this – there is a …… No word for it so….. will say a distraction – that also creates a bond.  This can take many forms. One form – a mantra. Customized to each sub usually, but something that you can give daily – even hourly instruction towards. Something the sub can use at prescribed activities typical in daily life that would create that association with their dom – even when separated from their dom.

A few examples:

One sub had the mantra of “My Master is my world – My Master is my focus”. And please – keep in mind – I am an education based dom – I tell all my subs what is the purpose of such instruction as a mantra – and the effect it will have. And then it is prescribed and they learn to accept what my pre-warning was as truth. This sub had a condition of anxiety – especially in social situations and especially while driving. She was taught to repeat her mantra continuously while driving. She had 4 driving trips per workday. Two averaging 1 hour, and two averaging 30 minutes. The result was total elimination of stress during drives (despite her citing people in gridlock traffic looking at her like she was singing versus just recital of her mantra) but it also served – as her master had told her it would – an association of bond and servitude and greater depths of her commitment to her Master. If you say something enough times it becomes true – just as I had pre-warned her about – and such as the endeavor she undertook in accepting and following the instruction.

Another sub, one who was brilliant in introverted thinking – but forced by her job to do negotiations (both internally to her company as well as externally with clients) – but paralyzed with fear at even the thought of the word “Negotiations” and in a position where she could not or would not reveal such to her superiors at her company). A creative solution. Her mantra was “I am here to help” (But when in front of her Sir, myself, it was “I am here to serve”). For this sub I gave a technique of interlocking her fingers and pushing (or even pounding) her thumbs together in rhythm. I instilled in her the thought of her right dominant hand being her Sirs pelvis, and her left non-dominant hand being her, bent over, and receiving her Sir.  In just a few short months she had built a reputation of being a master negotiator and, her peers (A few I was friends with) would regale stories of “And when she starts pounding her thumbs together, and when she says “I am here to help”, then fuck man – it was all over. She won every negotiation. Man that can intimidate……”. If only they knew she was focusing past the situation and only imagining her Sir pounding her hard. LOL. (Friends – we have talked about a Dom best serves their sub when they challenge them and help them grow – right?)

3) The constant reminder.  One technique I leverage often for a sub who has a second life – even if just a professional work life – is the aspect of a constant reminder. This can take many forms. A few subs are required to take practice of wearing panties and forgoe it altogether in favor of being oiled before work. The constant wetness a constant remind of their Dom. I often also require they reapply oil with every trip to the bathroom (Think 3-5 a day). For others – it may be wearing an anal plug through the day. One sub had to wear a tie in her hair too tight – a constant pull on her hair. This is an every second reminder of their servitude – even when they can focus beyond – their Dom is always with them. This one works very well.

4) Being an extension of their Master.  I have touched a bit in previous posts (but likely need to expand upon) the difference between dominant hand and non-dominant. If you want a sub to focus on their masters servitude – require they go through their day only using non-dominant hand (as dominant hand is ONLY at their Masters use). I challenge the subs out there – whatever hand you use as dominant – go one day cognoscente of that hand being owned as an instrument of your dom only – and honor your dom by ONLY using the non-dominant hand. Have your dom prescribe punishments when you fail to meet this. Try it for just one day – and see for yourself the power in this.

5) The Daily challenge. I offer my subs a few criteria before they leave for their “Other World”. It  can range from – find a female to flirt with, find a man whose arm you can brush your breast against, find a way to expose yourself in a public setting (Like opening your legs while wearing a skirt but in a busy Starbucks), find a way to distract someone (Like dropping something then picking it up while keeping knees locked) – anything that allows your sub to FEEL their own sexuality (Which also reinforces their feeling of their Doms appreciation and recognition of such). Only warning – give your sub safety parameters – you never want them to compromise their safety in public.

I am continually challenging myself by sharing my own techniques and secrets as well as to push boundaries that will push controversial responses. I push myself because I want to go beyond my own safety as I have pushed my subs before. I need to do so – even if at times I feel like over-exposed. Feedback – challenges, input is VERY welcome. I look forward to your comments….is this helpful?